How to get others to support you, trust you and listen to your ideas

When I told my parents in 2014 that I was going to start an online business to leave Microsoft and travel the world, they didn’t take me too seriously.

They told me to stop fooling around, and to take care of the job I had because in Spain with the crisis everything was very bad.

When during the following weeks I kept insisting that I was going to leave and tried to explain to them with logical arguments that this online business was not some crazy idea, they continued not to support me.

And what’s more: not only did they not support me, but my father sent me from time to time “dissuasive” e-mails with links to news about the unemployed who did not have enough to feed their children, or about success consultants who had lost everything and lived in the park, and with issues such as “So that you value what you have…”, hoping that this would make me reflect.

Finally, after several weeks of back and forth, I decided to stop talking about this topic with my family and changed tack.

I realized that no matter how many arguments I gave them, I was not going to convince them with words, so what I did was lock myself up to work. Then, a few months later, when I already had a niche page that was generating more than €1,000 a month, I sent them an email with a link to the website and the bank receipt for the last payment from Amazon.

That email changed everything.

From that day on, my parents stopped telling me about “don’t talk nonsense, put your feet on the ground”, and their speech became “we’re fine that you want to leave, but first save a little more and wait until give you the green card so you can come back.”

My father stopped sending me e-mails to scare me, and started reviewing the articles on my website and suggesting improvements and corrections.

And when I told my friends in Spain about my plans, they no longer looked at me as if I had gone crazy, but instead asked me to explain how they could do the same.

This experience taught me a great lesson that I will never forget:

than actions, but above all the resultsThey speak much louder than words

And it is that, if you want someone to support you, trust you or listen to your ideas, the best thing you can do is shut your mouth and let your actions and your results speak for you.

A real example: how to get thousands of people to follow your advice

My friend Marcos Vázquez, the creator of Revolutionary Fitness, has been publishing articles on fitness and nutrition for more than 5 years.

Their recommendations are often contrary to what conventional wisdom says, and even contrary to what doctors and health associations advise. In fact, their mission is to change the way most people eat and train today.

However, in episode #7 of “Una vida a tu medida”, Marcos explains that he does not go around telling people that they are eating and training badly, despite the fact that he has studies and objective information that show that he is right.

If you did, they wouldn’t listen to you, because no one likes to be told by a stranger that they’ve been wrong their whole life.

Instead, what Marcos does is focus on writing and creating new shows, and letting the results of his followers be the ones that spread his message.

Because when someone –thanks to their articles and products– loses weight, feels better or manages to treat a disease that until then they had been unable to cure with pills, the people around them see those results and start asking questions:

• “Hey man, you look good, what have you done to get those muscles?”
• “Wow, you are so much thinner! How did you do it?”
• “Don’t you have an allergy anymore? And so?”

And there, at that moment, they are willing to listen.

This is how Marcos has managed to get hundreds of thousands of people around the world to follow his ideas despite not being a doctor, nutritionist or personal trainer.

Because their ideas work and produce results.

Facts, not words

If you have made the decision to abandon the conventional path and create a life that suits you, it is normal that your parents, your family and your social circle do not support you.

It is normal that no matter how much you explain to them what you do and why you do it, and no matter how good arguments you give them, they do not understand you.

If that’s your case, don’t keep insisting.

It is a losing battle.

Instead, surround yourself with the few who do listen (you’ll find plenty on this blog) and focus on working hard to prove them with results that you did the right thing.

Because when they see that you have more time for them, that you are happier and in a better mood, and above all that you have money to eat every day and that you don’t live under a bridge (or that you even earn more money than before)…

That’s when they start to believe in you.